With technology continually on the rise and dating sites becoming much more of the norm, I think we should do ourselves a favor and dig into the topic of online dating. Because I have several really close friends, that I greatly admire, who stand on the opposite side of the spectrum. There are also great Christian ministries that I highly respect who hold very different views. The goal of this blog post is to help you think through the pros and cons of online dating and evaluate if this is something you should personally use, either now, or in the future. I feel extremely confident that God has me exactly where He wants me right now.
Any allergies? Prior or current health problems? Do you smoke? What are your views on smoking? Are your spending habits disciplined?
Do you tithe? What is your view of debt? How would you describe your work ethic? Do you have a high standard of excellence? Do you tend to be either slothful or a workaholic?
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How many hours per week do you work? Do you travel with your job? If so, how often? Do you see this changing in your future?
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If a relocation were offered to you by an employer, would you consider it? What would you weigh when considering such a move?
What is your discipline in studying?
Do you read regularly, and if so, what? Who is your favorite author? Outside the Bible, what would be your five favorite non-fiction books? Five favorite fiction books? What are your habits regarding sleeping? Are you lethargic? Are your sleep habits irregular? Do you follow a regular sdule? Are you organized? Would you consider yourself neat or messy? What is your practice regarding personal prayer?
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What is your level of personal cleanliness and hygiene? Do you have any personal habits that might annoy others? Marital Roles If you already subscribe to the concept of courtship, give me your definition of it. Do you tend to be more of a leader or follower in life?
What is your attitude toward women? What is their purpose? What is your view on the role of a wife? What are your views on women working outside the home?
What are your views concerning divorce and remarriage? Can you tell me your thoughts on how a man should provide for a wife and family? Can you tell me your thoughts on how a man should protect a wife and children? How do you feel about guns? How do you see your future relationship with your in-laws working out?
How do you relate to children? How often are you around children? What is your attitude toward adopting children? What are your thoughts on family worship?
What would be the key attributes of such a practice in your home? When you fail someone, what actions do you take to rectify the situation? Are you honest? Do you ever slant the truth for your own benefit? How have you prepared yourself for marriage? In what ways do you think you may need to grow before marriage? Are you prepared to put your wife first, before all others, including your parents?
Give me an example of what this may look like to you. Moral Standards What are your standards of propriety in dress? How do you dress? Describe your standards of dress for women? What are your views on public swimming? Do you watch television, R-rated movies? PG-rated movies? What were the last five movies you watd? What kind of music do you prefer? What kind of music would you find offensive?
Have you ever been exposed to homosexuality? If so, explain the extent and the circumstances. Do you currently use any type of drugs? Have you in your past? Do you have any financial debt? Have you ever been in trouble with the law? What tendencies do you have toward prejudice or racism? Have you ever had periods of rebellion? Are there any unsettled issues with your parents? Miscellaneous Discussion Starters What is your attitude toward pets?
What are your political leanings? What is are your favorite sources for news? What are your interests, hobbies, talents? What is your attitude toward family home business? What do you value most highly in life? What next? What do you tend to do in your spare time? What is your involvement in sports? Do you participate, attend games, watch it on TV? To what extent? What What are your thoughts on alternative medicine?
What are your thoughts on immunizations?
What is the role of psychology in the life of a Christian? Do you prefer to live in the city, suburbs, town, or country; farm, seaside, mountains, or desert? Why Your Future Can you describe your life purpose, i. What role would your wife and children play in your life purpose?
Where do you see yourself in 10 years? In 20 years? Where do you see yourself spiritually in 10 years?
When the Lord calls you home, how would you like people to remember you? Expectations Do you have a personal timetable for marriage? If so, what is it? What are expectations about situations where one of us might be alone with someone of the opposite sex?
What type of education are you hoping that your future wife will have? List the five most important characteristics of a wife for you personally.
List any characteristics or personality traits that would bother or irritate you in a wife. How are tasks shared in the home: cleaning, cooking, washing dishes, yard work, car upkeep, repairs, shopping for food, and household stuff?
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Children Should we have children? If so, when? How many?
How far apart? Would we consider adoption? What are the standards of behavior? What are the appropriate ways to discipline them? What are the expectations of time spent with them and when they go to bed? What signs of affection will you show them? What about school?
Christian school? Public school? Lifestyle Own a home or not?
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What kind of neighborhood? How many cars? View of money in general. How much to the church? How do you make money decisions? Where will you buy clothes: Department store? Entertainment How much money should we spend on entertainment? How often should we eat out? What kind of vacations are appropriate and helpful for us?
How many toys? Snowmobile, boat, cabin?
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Should we have a television? What is fitting to watch? How much?
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What are the criteria for movies and theater? What will our guidelines be for the kids? Conflict What makes you angry?
How do you handle your frustration or anger? Who should bring up an issue that is bothersome?
What if we disagree both about what should be done and whether it is serious? Will we go to bed angry at each other? What is our view of getting help from friends or counselors? Past Sins and Confessions: Are you a virgin? If not, please explain. Did you ask forgiveness of your partner? Masturbation 3. Homosexuality 4.
X-rated videos, games, internet sites? If you were involved in any of those activities, but are not now, why did you stop? If you are still involved, are you willing to seek outside counsel? How do you plan to keep you and your loved one from falling into sexual sin prior to marriage?
Is there anything in your past that I would be surprised by if I found out? June 18, at am. Bella D. Bethany Baird says:.
June 19, at am. Irish tai n mai says:. June 18, at pm. Hannah B says:. C says:. Annie says:. Cecilia says:. Amber Newman says:. June 19, at pm. Although I am very open to starting a relationship, I have to trust that God can provide a man for me if He desires.
My life verse Proverbs has really become my personal mantra on this issue. In the future, it might be. It can help differentiate the intentional from the non-intentional. It expands your pool of fish. By going online you will have many more potential options. No longer are you limited to the tiny pool of people you personally know, but you now have access to people all over the country.
Personality, religion, and preference mats. Online dating sites are well known for matching guys and girls up according to personality, religion, and preferences, etc. Many believe that this helps narrow down the options and gives you a better chance of relationship success. You can make your marriage interest known.
Online dating is often for the purpose of finding your lifelong match.
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Dangers of the unknown. That can be a little scary. Without serious wisdom involved you could end up chatting with a total weirdo or creeper. Time consumer. It takes time to create a profile, time to keep up with emails and time to get to know the different potentials. Financial investment.
They require memberships and membership fees. Security of your private information. Best foot forward. Online dating gives the users the chance to put their best foot forward and keep the ugly in the background. It can be difficult to know the true beliefs, convictions, and character of the guys you meet. Possible lack of trust in God. Online dating has the potential to be used because of a lack of trust in God. A lack of trust that God is the Creator and hold the hearts of Kings in His hands.
Rushing through the single years. God is working in your life and giving you opportunities to grow and become more like Jesus.
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God has tons of work the harvest is plentiful but the workers are few and singles are a great set of people to focus on that Kingdom work. Think through the possible work God might have for you before getting online.
I feel like there is so much more I want to say but I need to wrap it up. Let me leave you with these final thoughts. All in all your life as a Christian girl is about reflecting Christ and pointing others to Him. If you are fully striving to trust in Him, rely on Him, and rest in Him, then I think the answer to your online dating question will become quite clear.
Just remember that God is bigger, mightier, and more amazing than you could ever imagine. Are you for online dating or against it? What pros do you see and what cons do you see? Share below. Photo Credit. Another drawback is not knowing the person in the context of their community. Just something to keep in mind.
My cousin got married to someone he met through online dating so I know that God can definatly work through it. Online hacks are actually not as hard as some people think they are. Proceed with caution in that ct as well.
I think this has a lot of good points. I am not all for OR against it. In fact, I know a couple that met on Christian mingle! Another con is that people can be completely lying about themselves.